It is evident that the stress of dealing with an alcoholic family member bears a toll. Nothing was more evident that this when I received news that a dear friend could be moving away.
I felt like someone had sucker punched me. It is not malicious and it may be a great opportunity for my friend and I am happy for them, but I don't think I have cried like this since my father died and even then I don't think I felt so alone.
The stress of worrying about what the alcoholic thinks makes for thinner skin or a softer heart or just a weaker one. I was taken aback at how much of a blow the new of my friend's departure could have such a gut wrenching impact on me. I have another dear friend, but knowing that there is more than one other person out there praying for me and my spouse is an uplifting feeling. So why such a tail spin? I know that God has been listening to my rants and fears and disappointment over the last day or two and He knows how torn I am. Thrilled for them, but terrified for me. It is like a piece of my foundation is being pulled away. I know that God provides and I know that He is a constant source of refuge. I need only to ask. I also need to ask him to strengthen my faith in Him. I need Him now more than ever.
God bless,
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